Let's Ask the Internet: Dropping a course

How do you suggest to a student that you think he/she should drop a course? Let’s ask the Internet!

“How to tell someone” … autocomplete suggestions “you love them” or “you have herpes”.
Nope. These questions might be related — just not to my question.

“How to tell someone you think” … “they have borderline personality disorder”.

“how to tell someone you think they should drop” … “a class”. Bingo.
No relevant results. Why did you suggest that autocompletion?

Open letter to the Internet:

Dear Internet,

I thought you knew everything. When I was three, I used to think my parents knew everything, too. Now, I see that I am wrong again. How many times can one face disillusionment in life?

Twice Burned

Edit: Internet’s response:

Subject: Re: How many times can one face disillusionment in life?

Dear user 7138620,

You can activate your Microsoft Office Home Edition product key up to three times.

Digitally yours,
The Internet

Social Skillz 4 N3rdz: Telling jokes

Are you the kind of nerd that is forced to interact with “normal” people? Maybe it’s your boss. Or maybe it’s the postal worker from whom you pick up your Amazon deliveries. Whatever nerve-wracking situations you find yourself in, this guide will help you navigate the treacherous waters known as “social interaction” (colloquially known as “talking to people”) and help you pass an in-real-life Turing test like a ninja, fooling people into thinking you are human rather than a glasses-wearing inhabitant of uncanny valley.
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The Students' Marks Will Fall

Last week, while picking up an exam written at an alternate time by one of my students, my brain went into music mode, as it often does. It ended up rewriting a good two verses of ABBA’s The Winner Takes It All before I realized what had happened. I finished it up and, while I don’t have a gift as a lyricist, I thought I’d share a bit of dark humour (with apologies to ABBA). I don’t have good recording equipment, otherwise I’d make my own recording (although if someone wants to record this with me just for funsies, I’d be game). Instead, here’s a link to an unadulterated version.
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If you’re reading this, the rapture probably hasn’t happened ((As with all my posts, this has been scheduled in advance, so I may have “left the building”.)). But then again, what would you expect from a non-prophet organization?